Pregnancy Thoughts...

I've been meaning to post about this pregnancy for a while... life is going on and it's passing so quickly!

This pregnancy has definately been the hardest of the three so far. I'm utterly exhausted, and I only stopped feeling nauseaous a few weeks ago... although that could be down to poor management on my part to be fair. Also I didn't feel any definate movement this time until about 20 weeks, which shocked me a little since I felt Eve move around 9 weeks, and Willow at about 10.

Based on where I started to feel movement (down near my CS scar and round the sides) I'm pretty sure my placenta is attached on the wall nearest my belly button, and so there's been a lot of padding. It generally moves up during gestation, which would explain why I'm getting lots of movement low down and on the sides and anything towards the mid/top of my belly is quite muted.

I've had a two unusual pee test results (for me that is), a week or so ago my pH was a little high and I had some bladder pain, which I assumed was a UTI in the making... lots of water and cranberry juice drinking later... it's gone and I feel better. I thnk the other was a high-ish glucose result, but I'd probably had something sugary to eat, and it was fine later on...

I know my blood pressure has been high once or twice (unsurprisingly) I can actually feel it. I feel shaky and wound up, even when there's nothing to be wound up about.

I haven't heard little ones heartbeat yet, but mum thinks she has. I've just had no time where I've been in the quiet with nothing I'd rather do. I wasn't very good at it last time I tried so maybe I've been put off a little.

Belly has been getting larger. My fundus is getting higher. I haven't actually measured it with a tape, because I still think it's a bit of an inaccurate thing to do anyway. I seem to just be carrying the majority of this baby inside me rather than on the outside. I'm fine with that, I'm good with not being overburdened right now, I have 2 smalls and a husband to try and look after! Also I have my fathers knack of blending into the background it seems, and again, I'm fine with that. I don't need to be the centre of attention, well, ever really (except with Nick)

I'm not worried that we haven't had a scan. I'm not worried that I'm not getting "proper" midwifery care. I'm more than capable of watching over a "normal" pregnancy. There's nothing they can do that I can't already do myself as long as things progress "normally"... I can even scare the wits out of myself about things perhaps not going as well as last time, if I so desire. I really don't need help, or interference in this right now.

My thoughts right now are that what will be, will be. There is a plan. All I can do is prepare myself for every eventuality and keep my thoughts open to any changes that might happen.

If there's anything I am worried about, it's how the "authorities" might react after the fact. There's not a lot I can do about that though, I am well within my rights here, I'm not doing anything wrong, and they will simply have to accept that fact.

I'll try to post belly pictures next time I am online... for now I want to spend the rest of the girls nap knitting.... because that stocking isn't going to finish itself!